Weyburn's Heidi Vogel took to social media yesterday to assure others they're not alone in the struggle this winter to beat the blues. She shared how she's 'been doing everything right', and she still feels a heaviness. However, she knows what always helps is connection, even if it means some vulnerability by reaching out to others. 

A writer at heart, Vogel uses words to create bridges between people, and between her own heart and mind. But while the long, cold winter of 2021/22 has had its toll, her words have found their place amid the gloom.

"I've lived in Saskatchewan my entire life, basically, so I'm no stranger to long cold winters. The weather is a huge factor for sure, but it's because of all these other things that are going on at the same time that this winter has just felt so long, everything feels so bitter." 

Vogel said it's not only her own personal issues, but it's a cultural climate. The weight of the world.

"I'm bitter about COVID going on for two years, and then the weather on top of that, and you basically feel stuck," she shared. "You can't go outside and I am a person that loves to be outside, and I can't be outside when it's minus 50 or there's like 70 kilometre winds. So it's just that cabin fever has just felt really extreme, and I think it's just because I've been feeling this way for such an extended period of time." 

"This wasn't just like a week or two, it's been pretty much since January that there's what I called a heaviness, because it's physically what it feels like. It's just everything just feels so heavy, like, my energy, the energy around me."

She said her post spurred many people to say, 'me too'.

"It's like the collective energy is just so heavy. We're getting the warmer weather, so that's why I kind of started it saying, 'I feel like there's a light at the end of the tunnel now, and I feel more optimistic, that I'm going to start feeling better soon, once I can get outside, and maybe if the sun would shine once or twice, that would be great too," she noted. 

All of the things that have worked for her previously when she's down haven't worked this time.

"They've been like 'tried and true' things for me, like writing, exercising, yoga. They're all practices that I have done in the past that generally can make me feel better right away, but it's been like almost two months and I'm still struggling to feel like my normal self."

Vogel jokingly said she's been known to make a Facebook post more like 'a novel' in length, and this post was not planned. 

"When you are vulnerable like that, it's terrifying at first, but honestly, when I write those posts, I shut my notifications off. I'm scared to read all the messages, but eventually I do, and every single time people are always so supportive." 

She said the relatability of this post resounded for those who reached out to her, many of whom she doesn't speak with often.

"I think my intention when I write those things is that I want I want to get that support from people, because I know that's what happens, and then just always that sense of community where it's like, I know I'm not alone. But when you can vocalize it, and then you have this reassurance behind you, and all these people that are like, 'yes, I totally feel this', then that starts conversations."

"By the end of the day I generally feel better because I've had people reach out, and I've got to have all these conversations and I feel better, and I think that helps other people, too." 

The concept of reaching out when struggling is easier said than done for some, said Vogel. However, honesty and vulnerability can lead one down paths of support and connection that can bring healing, and can also help encourage kindness and compassion among humans.

Vogel's eloquent expression is found here:

vogel post